Monday, June 30, 2008

Blog Revival

I’ve been laughing for the past half hour. The unfortunate part—the resulting tears stung the raw sunburned corner of my left eye. But the mocking is worth the pain. Over a year ago while living abroad, I thought it would be a great idea to kick start my creative writing career with a daily blog, a little practice for an amateur. So I did. Blogged once, deleted it. Reformatted and blogged again and again and again. Literally there are three posts from 2007. Let me explain why…

I’ve noticed that I’m a creature of association. Every song conjures up a forgotten vivid memory from years past. Foods, shops, activities and even friends drift in and out of my life seasonally. So when a year has lapsed I find myself wanting those same comforts. In the summer heat I want to the freedom to be bikini naked on a sand court. In fall I want an entire new school wardrobe and new friends. In winter I retreat to my blankets and in spring I wake up thinking about running. Lame and predictable, but what I didn’t predict was the repeat desire to start a blog.

After the trauma and excitement of being Stateside I completely forgot about my attempted blogging. Fast forward to April 08 and I entered my own version of Groundhog’s Day. I wanted to blog about everything, my love affair, my failing company, going back to school, cars, friends, eating disorders, pets—half that stuff I don’t even have. But my opinionated self was willing to share anyway. What stopped me was a dear friends’ blog. A couple I know had started a blog a month or two before and I was on the weekly update plan. I would check out what they’d done and think about things I could be blogging. Then I’d feel foolish and easily influenced so I’d move on to lunch.

Imagine my surprise when I found myself with weeks of unmanaged time and the gnawing need for a blog. Then I remembered what I’d been doing last year. OMG! I have a blog. Forgotten and I hoped (unsuccessfully) deleted. When I logged in just to check if the account was still activated I started giggling. There was my blog, with two more posts than I thought.

So now I just have to decide. Do I keep it up in lemming fashion or do I publish this and lock away the memory for next year’s moments of unemployment? I think I’ll wait to see how I feel after tomorrow’s dramatic remembrance.