Our Pet's Heads Are Falling Off

...Or maybe just mine after a gruesome deep tissue sports injury recovery massage. When I stumbled to work the next morning looking something of train wreckage, my office buddy Paul decided we should compare workout notes. A short comparison as my massage therapist beat me to a bloody pulp as if she were tenderizing a steak. As Paul droned on about his intense workout I thought what happened to my girl friends and girl talk? I miss the late nights doing our nails, plucking, wrapping, waxing and whining about our hips, thighs and stomachs. Stacey and I even had a bra contest and she still makes fun of me for losing.

The crazy late night obsessions and Gold's Gym runs disappeared when Stacey moved to Vegas with her husband. But the conversations on body image just changed form. Recently I find the same phrase falling from the lips of my closest (most-time-spent with) guy friends, “I’m trying to eat healthier so I can slim down.”

I’ve discussed zone, velocity, low-fat, no sugar and detox diets quickly followed by a weekly plan for workouts. The benefits of aerobic and anaerobic, card workouts, ladders and circuit training all to tighten up and shed Mr. Lippy, as my sisters call their stomach pudge (which they've had when?). Paul and I even started doing push-ups, dips and wall sits every hour.

My volleyball partner roped me into his new scheme as well. A contest to see who can loose the most weight in a month. I jumped in head first without considering anything, like how much easier it is for guys to loose weight and how dedicated they are versus my feeble attempts. But on Tuesday I'll ante up and step on the scale for a careful number tracking. I admit that guys approach this dieting thing with vigor. And I wish that my girls were still around to commiserate our weight through a bag of peanut butter M&M's.